this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
