Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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