that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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