I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
sarcasm needs its own font
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
