this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize
