All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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