i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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