Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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