I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Randomize
