So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
