420 ftw
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
