Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
