he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Randomize
