I feel like I'm in dance class right now
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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