Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
