Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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