it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
