i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
