i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
