There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize