Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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