she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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