everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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