you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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