You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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