I hate all girls vehemently.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
