She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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