im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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