garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Dual....:-)
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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