Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize