They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
