I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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