You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
