Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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