Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
