Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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