So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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