Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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