How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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