I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Randomize
