well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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