Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize