weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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