bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I need to calm my uterus...
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
