After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
