I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
