So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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