U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
