I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
