end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
