Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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