I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
